Lame date!

So I commented on my last post that I wasnt even going to waste the time of explaining it, but I just have to. There are so many aspects of this date, now after reflecting that I am just like WHY ME right now?

So we meet at Moca Lounge at 7pm last night. A nice little spot around my way that I love love love. My first impression of him was... thank god he's not ooogly. But he was a lot smaller and shorter than I remember without Kettle one and an array of other vodkas in my system. I totally did not even think about how much larger those police jackets make them look since their so puffy.

So I've said it before that I like tall men, he swears he's 5'11... but on my scale... nada... I'll give him 5'10 at the most... I had 2 inch heels on and was taller than him and I'm only 5'8... so someone's scale is a little off. Looks wise he's not the type of guy that is cute enough for me to approach if I was totally sober, but I cant complain, because it could have been a lot worse.

1st offense, he's not a big football fan. We were talking sports and a couple times he looked dazed and confused. He said he was a giants and eagles fan... Can that be humanly possible. I think not.

2nd offense, We started talking about music. Do you know he started bashing Mary J. Blige. Now you know you cannot bash Mary J to a young black female. Saying that every since she fell in love her music is terrible. I had to remind him that she just sold over 600,000 copies of Growing Pains in the first week in a time where hardly anyone sells that well, and her album leaked on the net beforehand, so that many people disagreed. He still went on to brag about how "Whats the 411?" Was far better than the new album. Obviously, he was speaking without having even listened to the new album because he couldnt back any of it up. I hate the people that want to keep Mary in a box... can she live, can she grow, can she become a better person. Then he went on to say that her old songs had more feeling in them and the lyrics were better than her new stuff. I had to then remind him that Mary barely writes any of her songs. he had no comeback.

3rd offense, He's from Guyana. My mailroom clerk at work is from there and we have a love/hate relationship. Some days he's cool and some days I just want to slap him. I felt the same here. He was talking about some singer from Jamaica who has been in jail for the past 10 years for statuatory rape, and has released 4 albums since being put in jail. That he is the best reggae singer, (although I had never heard of him, and at this moment still cant remember his name) and that he hopes he doesnt get out of jail because he knows his music will change and not be as good after he's released....

4th offense, Conversation was so lame and boring. There were a million weird pauses where no one knew what to say. Nothing endulging, endearing, and I was basically just going threw the motions after the first hour. So he aimed at the touchy feely approach as a way to keep things flowing. This turned me off even more. Especially since he saw one of my tattoos and then that ended up being conversation for the next 30 min. Him asking me a million questions about that.
He said something a little raunchy I thought for a first date so I poked him. Not in a mean way, but hard enough for him to know that it wasnt cute, and almost broke my finger. Not because his abs were so rock hard, oh no.. because the nigga was strapped. Yes he went on our date with his gun on him. Are you serious? Then when he dropped me off at home, I asked him if I could see it and he wouldnt let me. Now aint that a blip!!!

5th offense, The check comes. He picks it up and puts in back down. Now We both had a meal and 2 drinks each so I knew it couldnt have been too much. Plus there was a new years day special so everything was cheaper than it usually is. So I take a look at the check. The bill came to a grand total of................. Can I get a drum roll please..... $41.20; and the gratuity was already included. So I do the fake out and pull out my wallet. Thinking if worst came to worst I would just pay my half. Do you know he said, "You got this one?" What... whew it took everything for me not to go completely hood chick on this dude and slam $20 on the table and walk the hell out. But I said you know what, "Yup, I got it!"

There were many more offenses but I will just stop there. Why me? Why cant I have a nice decent date in NYC. I had a nice date a couple weeks ago but that was in ATL. Maybe I just need to pack up and move because the dating scene for me in NY has been nothing but a headache. That's why I sit at home and watch games by myself, because ish like this, I could have ate leftovers then spending $41.20 on a total bore.

LESSON LEARNT - Try to have some sort of constraints when a little tipsy, because most likely what you thought was something that was going to be quite tasty... might leave a bad taste in your mouth after the liquor has wore off.

I actually probably shouldnt even be posting this. He is a cop, he probably already did a background check and everything on me...lol!

36 comments

Opinionated Diva January 2, 2008 at 11:15 AM

Ok...I was cracking up through the cyan colored section of this post...but when you said dude asked, "You got this one?" My mouth fell WIDE open. I just could not believe it.

It was the first date. Now granted I always pull out my wallet with the intention of paying for my half. I've never had a guy actually let me pay, but I don't EXPECT him to say some dumb shyt like "you got this?"

I am so pissed for you!

Eb the Celeb January 2, 2008 at 11:20 AM

I've never had a guy actually let me pay either... especially since it was only $42... girl I was hella-mad!

Opinionated Diva January 2, 2008 at 12:09 PM

Ok I'm back...I got a call in the middle of leaving my reply. Since I actually WANTED to talk to him, I just decided to come back to my comment later...and let me tell you I am STILL pissed for you.

What a loooooooooooser and he was SHORT! I'm only five three, but I just can't date short men.

On another note...girl I have so many friends that complain about there not being any men in Atl, but I always meet guys there and they are a LOT nicer than the guys in NJ & NY. I would seriously consider moving there (not just because of the guys), if Atlanta had a MUCH better pay scale. Oh...and they need to figure something out about their water problem too.

magnoliapeach January 2, 2008 at 12:16 PM

Okay, okay, wait, wait:
This fool actually let you pay for the date?!
Then had the nerve to make some type of raunchy comment?
Then on top of that, didn't know nothing about nothing?
And had the nerve to be short?!

What in the hell?! Girl in the words of Waiting To Exhale, "you could've had a V8".

As a woman who lives in the ATL, there are indeed many pickings down here, but don't let that fool you, b/c cast your net in the pond and you may indeed get five fish. 2 will have a different swagger about it's tail, 1 will be married and trying to hide it, 1 will think b/c there are so many women casting nets, they can act a fool, but then there's that one fish that may actually surpise you. However I feel this may be the same everywhere.

B_More BAP Life January 2, 2008 at 1:16 PM

Poor thing...Things Have GOT to get better!!

clnmike January 2, 2008 at 3:04 PM

LOL, yep lame conversation will do it for me every time to.

Rell January 2, 2008 at 3:25 PM

I thought this kind of bad date only happened in the movies?

Keep on looking, your dude is bound to be there somewhere.

Oh and if he is a dude and doesn't know that much about football -- I question just how interested he actually was in you, haha.

Nicole January 2, 2008 at 4:11 PM

He let you pay the whole bill? So, wait...your tax dollars pay part of his salary and then you paid for his meal, too?

After two years here, I've given up on Atlanta men.

Skoolboi Krush January 2, 2008 at 8:11 PM

Between the lame conversation and not picking up the check, I can't decide which is the bigger offense. If dude is going to ask you out, he should be prepared to pay the bill. I guess that is how he was raised.

Nothing different about dudes in Atlanta. Most of us are from somewhere else anyway. If you keep moving, how is Mr. Right going to find you?

eclectik January 2, 2008 at 8:34 PM

WOW
THAT's a Date...welcome to '08 homie!

Hmmmm...we'll have to talk about this Mary thing

Shame we cant date I'm 5-11

Eagles and Giants? Thats a lame...just for saying Eagles off GP

Most guys are boring...unless they tryin to gass you or talking bull...the few that don't/arent are the keepers.

Lemme see the tat

Drive down...we gon go to Chipotle.

e.
eclectik-relaxation.com

Eb the Celeb January 2, 2008 at 9:58 PM

@ everybody... thanks for letting me laugh at my unfortunate situation... do you know that fool text me at 8:45 and all the text said was good night. I shouldnt havent even replied back but I was like he cant get any worse... so I text back..."uuuhhh I didnt know it was my bedtime" and he text back jut saying hi... ARE YOU SERIOUS.. the corniest of all corn balls. I have a headache now....

@schoolboi- i have to move because mr. right is def not in ny

@ E - you better not agree w/ him on the mary thing... make me hurt you... most guys are not boring... all I do is hang out with guys... I love you in all your retardedness... but I just couldnt deal with this dude... and NO you cant see my tatts... but if I am in the DC area I will take you up on that chipotle date... I love me some chipotle

MsPuddin January 2, 2008 at 11:31 PM

Damn he sounds all kinds of bad…I love football too and MJB, he’s trippin…

Maybe you two shouldn’t talk about music lol dating sucks period, don’t force it girl, it will come when the time is right. Otherwise you are going to get too drunk and want to stab yourself in the eye with a fork…

Rashan Jamal January 3, 2008 at 5:44 AM

Wow, yep that was a bad one. I should say something about you hating on the short guys, but I'm secure in my midget status. LOL

Did he really expect to get a second date after letting you pay for the first one? Not cool, homie!

Stacie von Kutieboots January 3, 2008 at 9:43 AM

NO.MA'AM!!

PLEASE tell me you're lying about the last offense!!!! OMG, i KNOW he didn't try your life with the, "you got this one?" ON THE FIRST DATE!?!? Is that how you impress people!??! What is $41?!?!? 2 $20s and a five would've sufficed and then you being the 2008 lady, would leave a lil tip!!!!! Oh my gosh he is sooooooo wack!! Oh I am sooooooo sorry!

The fact that he was wearing a winter jacket didn't cross my mind either...

UGH!! BE GONE Policeman!

Opinionated Diva January 3, 2008 at 9:47 AM

you are not a midget Rashan!

Eb...ugh @ the "just sayin hi!" LOSER!!!

Honey-Libra January 3, 2008 at 11:15 AM

Umm...It was your first date and he asked if you got it....WOW....you a good one cause I would have left LOL

AUSPIC January 3, 2008 at 11:52 AM

My gawd! What a loser! Yeah, cut him off at the knees! Punk!

Grown and Sexy January 3, 2008 at 12:33 PM

Oh No!!!! Protect and Serve huh? Guess he forget above the serving part. Now I am an independent black woman but there is an unspoken rule that men should get the meal, especially on the first date!!!! How dare he bash MJB!!!!!! No one, and I mean no chick out right now can touch her. We all felt her pain and now we are all happy for her. Yea, sometimes you wanna listen to the old songs because of a recent break-up and Mary is Xtra happy now but when I am happy I want those CDs as well. He is a loser to the fullest. Even if he did a background check on you hopefully he will learn something from reading all these comments on here. REAL NYCE!!!

Ladynay January 3, 2008 at 2:26 PM

Okay, I am going to assume that you asked dude out, even tho' you stated he is not the type you'd ask out, cuz you footed the bill.

There are chicks in the A talking about going north due to the lack of "good" men so stay where you are! LOL

Eb the Celeb January 3, 2008 at 4:26 PM

@puddin - LOL

@ rashan - I know right... I cant even believe he text me

@Stacie... whack is the perfect word

@honey-libra -girl it took everything not to act a fool... but he was strapped...lol... and you know NYPD get away with some crazy mess...lol

@ grown & sexy... I was thinking the same thing... hoping he will stumble upon my blog and realize how lame he really is

@ladynay - I initiated the convo the first night, but he called me and asked what my plans for new years evening was... I said I had none and he said well I really want to see you and get to know you better so I suggested dinner because he wasnt coming to the crib. So he asked me out but I came up with the idea...

jameil1922 January 3, 2008 at 6:33 PM

so what!? he should know how horrid that date was. i HOPE he looked it up. who brings a gun and doesn't let you see it?! that's terrible. i like guns and would've been pissed. and picking up the tab? you're better than me kid. lmao @ from Guyana. 2 strikes for that country, huh? lol.

The [In]Urbane Goddess January 3, 2008 at 7:42 PM

That's a damn shame. And as the sisters and brothers have chimed in on the dating game, it's the same shit all over!
I was soooooo excited when you said he was a police officer! Had a serious cop thing going at one point but he proved to be the craziest man I ever dated...but that doesn't mean I have given up on the brothers in blue...or black...
He's a real loser, but it made for a great post! :-)

Eb the Celeb January 3, 2008 at 10:32 PM

@everybody... he just text me again "hello out there"

OMG... he obviously felt the date went well... I am just going to ignore him... WHY ME???

Miss B January 4, 2008 at 12:22 PM

Wow...I'm sorry about that date...You know what's funny I have a friend in NY who says that dating up there is the worst ever.

But wait...he had you pay?? AND still trynna stay in contact...he must didn't get the GTFOH memo...lol

Liryc January 4, 2008 at 2:03 PM

OMG, I just finished reading this and I'm so sorry for you. I feel the same way. There are no available men in NY, but I'm not ready to move just yet. I am a big football fan and how in the world do you put the Giants and the Eagles in the same bracket? That is just wrong, I must have a guy who I can sit home with on a sunday and watch the games with.. Its just part of my weekend rituals. Secondly girl, not all Caribbean men are the same. Some are different, I haven't found one yet but I'll keep you posted.
Thirdly what does Jah Cure (the incarcerated Jamaican artist) have to do with anything.. Oh and I'll be darned if someone insults Mary.. I don't play that hot mess.. and last but definitely NOT least.. How the BLEEP do you let him let you pay.. I would've gotten up, pretended that I went to the bathroom and bailed. Or called the waitress over asked if she could redo the check into two separate checks, then pay my own and then bounce.. I hate cheap men! I am not saying that he has to bend over backwards and spend all he has but it was only $42 with gratuity.. WTF????? OH no... definitely too cheap for my blood.. (fanning myself because I feel my blood pressure rising)

soumynona January 4, 2008 at 3:37 PM

OMG, I've been missing out! I thought the date would have been over when the fool was like "What's a touchdown" I'll beat his po-po arse for you just for not liking football. And just like you said, you can't be an Eagles/Giants fan that's like being a republocrat
I will not address the atrocity that occurred at and after dinner for fear that if I see him he'll shoot me - but I feel like I can take his flashlight cop a$$ anyway

Homer is My Co-pilot January 4, 2008 at 3:47 PM

Don't hate on short men.. lol The rest of that mess was inexcusable. How you like 2 NFC east teams? He should get his man card revoked. He dead wrong for not paying too. I was always taught that if you want a second date you pay for the first.

Tom_Gurl January 4, 2008 at 4:02 PM

LMAO!!! I don't mean to laugh, but I can't believe it!!! All of that madness on a first date?? jeez! I guess there won't be a 2nd one....lol!

Oh, and the Jamaican singer he was referring to is Jah Cure....and to show him up a bit more about not knowing what he's talking about ...Jah Cure spent a lil over 8 years in prison and HAS already been released (on parole)

Eb the Celeb January 4, 2008 at 4:10 PM

@liryc & tomgurl - thanks for jogging my memory with the cats name Jah cure... yeah he definitely didnt know what he was talking about... my mailroom guy said that the dude was touring a couple months ago... so he doesnt even know that the dude aint locked up no more... such a lame... I am so threw with the situation!

Case Quarter January 5, 2008 at 11:08 AM

oh no...that is effing ridiculous...reading this made me mad for you!!! i can't believe men like this still exist!!

Afrodite January 7, 2008 at 6:49 PM

Uhhhh, you paid? Girl, you're better than me because I would've paid my half and bounced.

Eb the Celeb January 7, 2008 at 6:55 PM

@ everybody who told me I should have left - i was trying to be NICE... i recently had a performance review with my boss and he said I need to be nicer to people. I have been trying to apply that in all aspects of my life. I guess this wasnt the right time to implement that though according to everyone here...LOL ; it took everything for me not to slam a 20 down and walk out... but I'm glad I didnt even though he was an idiot... it did teach me slight patience and to stay calm in ignorant situations... I am so proud of myself... because a year ago... it would have gotten all kind of ugly in that lounge

Ticia January 8, 2008 at 3:54 PM

Aww girl! I am sorry! DAMN!!

Man, I haven't been on a date in ages.. *crickets* But that ain't the one I want to go on! LOL

The Horny Bitch January 10, 2008 at 9:01 AM

Should just say "I forgot to bring my wallet" and walk off.

Bet he have a 3 inch dick.. ahaha..

Jaesoreal January 12, 2008 at 1:02 PM

I am 5'7" so...yeah. But it's cool cause I still hold my own! I feel like a winner for real after hearing dudes be pulling stunts like that! I could NEVER say "you got this" on a first date! By the third or fourth, maybe! haha!

Help keep this site up and running


and be sure to follow @thegirthpodcast instagram for hilarious sex memes and on twitter episode highlights and daily sex articles.

My Renaissance People aka Blog Subscribers