Caption Me...

Hey everybody,

So I have had people in town since Thursday and of course everyone that comes into town all they want to do is shop and party. So that's what I have been doing the past couple days. Spent a lot of money, shopped, dranked, and partied. So I decided to post 5 pics from the festivities. After drinking, when I am sober again I love to look at the pics and wonder what the heck I was doing since this crazy I am sexier than the sexiest person alive spell comes over me.

Anyway, I will have a prize for the person that can give me the most creative, funny, interesting captions for each pic.

1. The internet pic


2. I told you liquor makes me think I'm sexy



3. Look at my face in the background. I just found out the boy I had been dancing with all night was only 19 years old.
4. Eb the Xena Princess Warrior

5. The group pic


Sidenote : Why leaving the club last night did me and the gang see this homeless man jacking off on the street. I thought I was going to die. I mean pants pulled down, sitting on some sort of contraption he had built himself, whacking away in the gorgeous 60 degree weather at 3 in the morning. I was both disgusted and intrigued at the same time. I couldn't turn away because the dude was packing... until he said "Which one of ya'll beautiful ladies wants to suck my d*ck." Then I almost took my platinum heel off and knocked his nasty azz out. We laughed about it the whole ride home. I know off-topic but I had to share. I wish I had got a pic of that but I was so appauled that my camera didn't even come to mind.

45 comments

E. Christian Wallace April 13, 2008 at 6:51 PM

Imma have to come back with some captions, but that story is funny as shit.

Chris April 13, 2008 at 7:27 PM

I can't contribute captions, but I'mma need you not to size up Anton Jackson while he's choking his chicken, LOL

Skoolboi Krush April 13, 2008 at 8:35 PM

You should have known it was a teen club when they served your drink in a plastic cup. (Can we say ghetto?) LOL

Still Patrice April 13, 2008 at 9:41 PM

LMAO @ the homeless man... MAD you ain't think to take a pic! lol

Eb the Celeb April 13, 2008 at 10:15 PM

@E. Chris Wallace - For real... you cant make up crazy ish like that

@Sass - He is a cutie... I quickly got over it and gave him my number... I feel like a child molestor... he has already called...lol

@Chris - I size up all d*ck... even if it was from a nasty ol' homeless man

@Krush - It was not a teen club... its was 21 & up... I dont know how that young'n snuck in there. and the spot is NOT ghetto...lol

@Pajnstl - Girl I'm mad too... didnt think about it until after... we laughed all the way home about that though

The Jaded NYer April 13, 2008 at 10:19 PM

I'm not good at captions but I just had to say DAMN- that's a crazy story (re: the homeless dude)!!!

And that silver top is too cute!! Rock on, Eb :)

RealHustla April 13, 2008 at 11:06 PM

1. Have boobs like these in just 4 hours! See, Eb at 12 am.
2. Now Eb at 2 am. Come back to see the final results.
3. Whoa, looks like she's experiencing some sudden growth right now. Hmmm, hope he's 21. Oh look, the girl in pink is having her final growth spurt. Don't worry it doesn't hurt at all, it actually feels really good and she's passing out in ecstasy. Her friend has to hold her up.
4. And see, the next day they still look quite plump.
5. Now, if we can just convince pinky on the end to enjoy this completely safe, and holistic remedy, we'd have another satisfied customer!

Mr. B2B April 14, 2008 at 1:52 AM

Eb.
dope weekend i can see..

er, who is that chocolate princess on your right (our left) in the first pic?
i think she is a stunner and she ain't even smiling...
if i could...
possibly meet her..

LOL @ you checking all d***...

so, if he wasn't homeless...

chuckles...
i like the pics, and yeah, alkohol does make you sexcee!
thanks for putting them up!

John "JP" Pickens April 14, 2008 at 3:26 AM

I will come back when I aint laughin. lol

JayBee April 14, 2008 at 6:08 AM

like the pics. like how you look in the xena pics too. your homegirl on the end in the last pic is cute too. maybe when my creative juices start flowing i'll post some captions. missing fact or fiction friday, but glad you and yo peeps had fun this weekend. so it is true that you can see anything in the city.

MP April 14, 2008 at 8:19 AM

I am not that girl when it comes to things like this so I do us all a favor and not even bother. I do have to say that you silver top is HOTT! F*ck i love it!

Dave Van Buren April 14, 2008 at 8:40 AM

1. I'm too sexy to smile, I'm too sexy to sit down, I'm too sexy to open my eyes

2. wait ya'll I really think the waves on the wall are moving.. no, no that's just the liquor

3. WOW... I don't think people really make love in the club

Bonus: Yeah baby I'll carry you to the table... wait, my back!!

4. Who needs diamonds when you can bling your whole chest?

5. The WB presents The new Girlfriends... Now with 1/3 the budget!!

thee modern isis April 14, 2008 at 8:56 AM

SMH The 19 year olds. It's somethin' in the water

Ticia April 14, 2008 at 10:27 AM

Cute pics ... and funny story!!!

Girl...my best friend was trying to find park...and the homeless, the "direct" you to a park-- of course, you need to tip them - well my BFF didn't and when he came out of the club, his tires were slashed!

Eb the Celeb April 14, 2008 at 10:45 AM

LMAO @ Homer is my co-pilot... you'sa fool and as of right now you are the winner unless someone comes up with anything better by midnight.

Keelah April 14, 2008 at 10:53 AM

GET OUT! We have a homeless dude like that in the D! I havent seen him since 99, maybe he is going cross country-Whackin in every town! Cuz this guy was hung as well. hahahhaha too funny!!!

i.can't.complain. April 14, 2008 at 11:36 AM

look at your face w/the tenderoni

classic !!

eb's getting her r.kelly on.

lmao.

i can't think of any captions, but u do look hot as always.

those shoes are something fabulous. the silver ones.

i had to do a scroll up to look at them again

lol@ the homeless dude on his "contraption"

dick that big should not be homeless.

he clearly made some poor life choices.

-1-

PCD (Pretty Circle Drawer) April 14, 2008 at 11:37 AM

i like homer's suggestions...

ya'll look nice...but that pic with your mouth agape is priceless!!

Monie April 14, 2008 at 12:07 PM

Oh, Eb, Eb, Eb...pic #3 is so priceless I cannot even think straight now. The face is CLASSIC!

*dead*

Marleaux April 14, 2008 at 12:14 PM

OMG, the homeless man packing… Heyell, I probably would have looked too, lmao. One time I was walking down the street and a man was walking our way with his dick out, but had it pointed towards the fence and was walking and peeing. I still can’t understand how a man can walk and pee. Shoot, I can’t even pee if folks are trying to talk to me from the next stall… BTW, that was the first one I had ever seen. I was about 14, so it kind of traumatized me.

Oh, and I can’t do the captions. I mean, I’ll be on your site all day trying to think of something clever to write and will never leave a comment.

Jackie E. April 14, 2008 at 1:03 PM

LOL@ the look on your face with the 19 year old!!! My AKA is Stella anyway, so I'm not mad at you:)

And that story about that homeless guy is dizzguzting!!! Ewwwww...., LOL!!

Rich Fitzgerald April 14, 2008 at 1:17 PM

the homeless guy stole the show.

*B* Fab April 14, 2008 at 2:00 PM

Wow! Ok, I was all set to try and give some captions then that damn story about the homeless man threw me all off track! But I will say I loved your tights!! I have a pair just like it! Looks like you had way more fun of a weekend than me!

TravelDiva April 14, 2008 at 2:20 PM

That is disgusting. LOL. Reminds me of a time when I was in Madrid at an outdoor cafe and this crazy homeless guy got mad because the cafe wouldn't serve him, so he pulled out his privates and started waving it around. I was horrified, disgusted, and he was not packing. I couldn't finish my fries.

dejanae April 14, 2008 at 2:25 PM

ctfu@the homeless man story
crazy folk
gotta lovem

Melody.Darlene April 14, 2008 at 2:30 PM

hahahahahah! ur face in number 3 is HILARIOUS!! hahahaha!

The Flyyest April 14, 2008 at 2:37 PM

cute pix...and the look on your face is ssooo priceless!!!! LOL

that side bar made me laugh...i needed that!!

Slaus of O Hell Nawl April 14, 2008 at 2:39 PM

.. I aint even gont touch this one. The jokes are abundent!! Lookin kinda hot up on the wall though.

the picture with ol boy straining t pick up ol girl up is looking he is is yelling: At jerome! throw me some spinach!!

and in the background, you look like you tryna swallow ol boys soul straght from his mouth. Like a brooklyn version of the x files.

diggin the xena top pic. Rawr. tres chique. Lookin like a bootlegg X_men n shyt. Storm's lil sister: gust.

anonymousnupe April 14, 2008 at 3:32 PM

Late to the game, but I took my momma to McCormick and Schmick’s for her birthday. Long lunch.

Aw-ight, here day go:

1. "Damn, I wish she would hur-rup and snap this pic. My weave ‘bouta itch a whole in my head!" Or: "How dese heffas git all the cleavage?! Where was I the day it was being distributed?! Heffas!"

2. "I’ma hafta quit frontin’ and go ‘head and buy me a belt that fits one-a dese days." Or: "Dontcha wish your girlfrin was a drunk like me?!"

3. "I understand you aroused yougin’, but why is it vibratin’, man?!"

4. "I wonder if I should show ‘em my stainless steel boy shorts too."

5. "Oh no she don’t got her tittie on my arm! Hole-up, though. That don’t feel bad…What's up now, Kierra girl?! I'm hafta holla."

Eb the Celeb April 14, 2008 at 5:40 PM

@Slaus & Nupe - I hate you both so much...lol... but good stuff... very good stuff!


Nupe and Homer are neck and neck for the prize though... I love it!

1/3 April 14, 2008 at 7:32 PM

I really like the silver ensemble you got on:-)

eww at homeless man jacking off. I cant believe you said he was packing LMAO

LOL the pic with you dancing with the 19 yr old is a classic lol

eclectik April 14, 2008 at 7:45 PM

Fun Knee...and tell that girl on the end she gotta committ...get that hand on the hip!

e.

Alice S. April 14, 2008 at 8:13 PM

I'm not creative enough to make up any captions. I just stopped by to say that pic 3 is PRICELESS!!

kit von b. April 14, 2008 at 8:23 PM

im mad slaus called you gust tho.

-KB

magnoliapeach April 14, 2008 at 8:45 PM

HE WAS JACKING HIS JIBBY ON THE STREET?!!! EWWWWWW!!

Though I wonder what kind of lubrication he used to get that party started?!

LMAO @ I.Can't.Complain's: D*ck like that shouldn't be homeless!!

The F_Uitlist April 15, 2008 at 12:05 AM

Too tired to comment but as in all the party pics you look like you were having a ball.

Ewww homeless jack off! I would have taken a pic of that only in our fair city!

Afrodite April 15, 2008 at 12:18 AM

That sounds like something you might see in the Bay Area...

eclectik April 15, 2008 at 4:52 AM

You're very popular and loved.

Anonymous April 15, 2008 at 10:06 AM

LMBO @ Homeless Dude

Pic # 2 -- You're thinking "This is sooo a myspace photo opp."

Queen of My Castle April 15, 2008 at 11:30 AM

LMAO @ that story. You will NOT be noticing that ol' boy was packing. LOL. I think I would have been sick to my stomach after he asked that question, though.

Cute pics. I like the 2nd one best.

Oh, and I commend you for not letting any one of your girls step out looking like BooBoo the Fool. Kudos.

Eb the Celeb April 15, 2008 at 12:17 PM

@magnoliapeach - I dont know what kind of lubie he used but it was glistening under the street light...lol

@E - I dont know what you mean by that but you are the one that's popular and loved... you have celebs reading your blog

@Queen - When he first said that I swear I was about to knock him out... and if he wasnt packing and it hadnt been so long since I got me some I may been able to concentrate on knocking him out instead of how well endowed he was...lol Dang I need to get me some because that is just straight nasty!

Mizrepresent April 15, 2008 at 7:58 PM

1. Got an itch...then scratch.

2.Got to hold on to this piece of wall before i fall...or everybody do the Humptety Dump.

3.Oh Hell NAW!

4.Oh yeah, Viking Breasts...you heard!

5.The Men all Pause...when we walk into the room.

lol, loved this post!

proacTiff April 16, 2008 at 3:49 PM

I'm with Rich; homeless homeboy stole it!

Anonymous April 20, 2008 at 8:41 AM

I know im mad late but I had to caption these.. ok here I Go

1. eb " the bench and table is whats holding me up for this picture and its only 7:30"

extra: girl on the left "nigga u know i wasn't ready"

girl on right: "this is payback for that bullshit picture yall took of me in 3rd grade nah what bitches!

2. "come hither sexy camera man

3.guy u dancing with "and its not even all the way hard yet"

extra: girl and guy "back up yall I got this" girl: "im finna die"!!

exra that guy in the orange shirt like "did u just touch me? u lookin to get beat down"

4."I know imma be beeping in the security line.

5. I couldnt think of one for this picture. but it reminded me of ms jay from next top model waving his finger at yall talkin bout "yall are fierceeeeeeeeeee!!

Sherece April 20, 2008 at 11:40 PM

In Pic #3... who's the dude in the front? I think I know him! LOL

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