Fact or Fiction Friday - When chickens come home to roost!

So these black weblog awards are going on... and one of my blog mates Dollface said she wanted to nominate me for best blog series with Fact or Fiction Friday but didn't since I hadn't done one in a while. I hadn't even thought about being nominated for anything but it did remind me of how much I love doing them and seeing your responses. It really takes a lot to really come up with a good concept... or to make something in real life fun to read, but I definitely had fun doing them. So I figured from now on I would try to do it at least once a month... so here goes...


FACT OR FICTION?

For those new to the set here are the rules. Read the following story and in the comment box reveal whether or not you think the story is fact or fiction. The story will be either all true or all false... so none of that "I think this part is true but the rest is false" mess for the people who have been cheating in the past...lol... Remember though, it does NOT always have to be MY truth... for instance this story below could have happened to a friend or family member without me being one of the chicks involved. Got it... good... enjoy!


You know we always talk about how men are attracted to the crazy chick, but have we ever sat down and evaluated the definition of crazy. Is crazy the one who goes threw your cell phone, or is she the one who accuses you of cheating constantly? Is she the one who acts a fool and always picks an argument in public, or she is the one who snuck into your apartment, cut up raw chicken, and put it in between your mattresses without you knowing...

Wait a minute on that last one... let's start from the beginning. So a close friend of mine was dating this chick for a while. I always thought she was a little off, and she wasn't the most attractive chick so although she wanted you to think she was strong, I could tell deep down that she was really insecure. His profession kept him out late at night, and she constantly questioned his whereabouts and why they weren't spending more time together. You would have thought this was a red flag for him to move on, but instead he moved her in. Figured she couldn't complain about spending time if they lived together.

The checking of emails started, the calling people in the cell phone, even accused me and him of sleeping together, and every other chick that he ever came in contact with for that matter. She was truly crazy. This went on for at least 3 years before he finally got fed up. I don't even know what it was, but he left to go to Vegas for a week and told her to be out of his apartment when he returned. She seemed okay with it, as if she was fed up even, realizing that the relationship had ran its course. Even sent him a text upon the week's end, a day before he was to return and said I left a little surprise for you in the apartment. Have a nice life!

When he returned, everything was normal, she had even cleaned up a bit. He was relieved that he had finally got rid of this chick. A week passes and he starts smelling something really foul in his room. At first he brushed it off... lit an incense... but as the days went by the smell seemed to get worse. He scoured the room thinking that maybe a mouse was somewhere in there dead but found nothing. He calls the exterminator... they come out and find nothing. He calls a female friend over to see if she can recognize the smell. Somehow they pull the mattress out... and what do they find. At least a dozen huge pieces of chicken that had been in between the mattresses spoiling for 2 weeks at this point.

He couldn't believe this crazy chick did this. First he calls her to cuss her out, calls her all kinds of crazy and hangs up. Then he gets kinda scared. What kinda chick does that? He had slept on that bed for 2 weeks. What if she put some kind of root on him. His friend helps him clean it all up and use every possible cleaning method to get the smell out of the mattress to see if it can be saved. They hear a knock on the door... its the crazy chick. She walks in causing a ruckus. Cussing, yelling, dramatic and all, then questions the friend as to who she is and why she was there... Friend doesn't give her the answer she wants to hear so she punches her right in the face. The two start tussling. The guy opens the door trying to push crazy chick out but his friend is still trying to get licks in. They all end up in the hallway of their apartment and then the door slams shut behind them. They are now locked out still arguing and fighting. Of course the noise causes the nosy neighbors to come out of their apartments, so finally crazy chick leaves.

His cell phone is locked in the apartment so he has no number to call the building manager on a Saturday and might be out of his apartment until Monday. Five minutes later crazy chick returns with a screw driver, breaks in the apartment, says your welcome without them even saying thank you because now he's thinking, "this crazy chick can break into my apartment anytime she wants", and then she leaves and he never hears from her again.

FACT OR FICTION?

60 comments

i.can't.complain. August 15, 2008 at 12:06 AM

ima go w/fact on this one, eb

kinda mad he thought she "put root" on him, though

lol...

men

-1-

Lovebabz August 15, 2008 at 1:09 AM

Fiction. Who is living like that? I have never heard of such CRAZINESS!

Vimbai August 15, 2008 at 3:19 AM

I'm gonna go with FACT!

Crazy chicks seem to be the Male Kryptonite or something!

Sweet KeiKei August 15, 2008 at 4:55 AM

i'm a have to go with FICTION.

i have crazy tendencies myself so this is a little farfetched.....but a great idea! lol

Tony OH August 15, 2008 at 7:49 AM

Damn Crazy, I mean Eb...lol

Why you do the brotha like that?

You a Bad Chick! :0)

MP August 15, 2008 at 8:42 AM

I'm gonna have to say fiction!

Partly because I don't even want to believe it.

Ms. Jones August 15, 2008 at 8:46 AM

I'm going to go with FACT simply because I don't underestimate any chicks "crazy" level!

Torrance Stephens - All-Mi-T August 15, 2008 at 9:03 AM

crazk chick is real u know i know
at the cut we call the SBIOs

sybils
sixteen bitches in one

hey have a great weekend eb
holla at yo folk sometimes jones

Real Talk August 15, 2008 at 9:03 AM

I'm gonna say fiction.
I thought it was fact up to the part where the crazy one walks in going off and then how the apartment door slams shut behind them...

Lina August 15, 2008 at 9:36 AM

Thats some crazy ass stuff, eb...but I wouldn't put it past a woman to do some stuff like that so I'm say FACT.

Rich August 15, 2008 at 9:55 AM

I was gonna say fiction because it reminded me of a story I heard about an ex-wife putting shrimp in the hem of some curtains when her husband took the house and moved his new chick in. However, I would put nothing past a crazy broad and the way she mind-f*cked him at the end by breaking in to the house -- priceless.

Let's put it this way, it may be a fact, but it surely is going to be fiction cause I may incorporate some of that into a story.

Smarty Jones August 15, 2008 at 10:28 AM

ROTFLMAO!!!!!!
This is funny stuff, it sounds like it should be in a movie. But there's one thing I've learned while working in the new business, some things you can't make up because your imagination can't fathom it.
I'm gonna have to go with fact on this one because this sounds like one of those stories that you can't make up.

Charles August 15, 2008 at 10:29 AM

Okay...I'm officially scared of sweet keikei. But seriously tho...chicken in the matress??? Wow...that's too far fetched to not be true...fact, final answer...

T.C. August 15, 2008 at 10:33 AM

Imma have to go with FACT

Qucifer August 15, 2008 at 10:42 AM

can crazy bitches be THAT crazy?????


I want to say fiction cause i'm in disbelief that heffas are coming up that pressed, that crazy and that full o'nuts

Thoughts of a Southern gal August 15, 2008 at 10:55 AM

I was thinking Fact until I got to the part about the door shutting and locking them out. I say Fiction.

Shy August 15, 2008 at 11:08 AM

Imma have to go with fiction. And the part about her coming back with the screw driver and opening the door, then never being heard from again had me ROLLING!!!! She betta be a good samaritan/crazy heffa! LMAO

The Jaded NYer August 15, 2008 at 11:35 AM

I think I know this female LMAO!!!

I'm gonna say fact because she soooo sounds like somebody I know...

Kayos August 15, 2008 at 11:57 AM

I'll go out on a limb and say FACT!

Miss Mika August 15, 2008 at 12:30 PM

I know some crazy chicks that would do that... but I am going to have to say fiction.

Gosh I hope this isn't true.

Ticia August 15, 2008 at 12:36 PM

Too good -

FACT - and I am loving it!

1/3 August 15, 2008 at 1:05 PM

I think its a fact. He's lucky thats all she did. Ive heard worse stories lol

Ms. Lovely August 15, 2008 at 1:08 PM

I have to say fact..chickens in the mattress lmfao!

Eb the Celeb August 15, 2008 at 2:02 PM

@tony oh - LOL... why are you assuming its fact and that it was me... dang...lol

@Rich - whether its fact or fiction how you gon jack? lol... I better get a mention or something...lol

@Jaded - "I think I know this chick" now that's scary...

Sweet KeiKei August 15, 2008 at 3:09 PM

hey eb, when u gon post the answer?

Mr.Slish August 15, 2008 at 3:34 PM

Hahahahahaha..Wait Wait Wait..hahahahahahah Chickne underneath his Matress! Thats is Classic...I hope this is true and I thought I had stories...lol

Eb the Celeb August 15, 2008 at 4:16 PM

@keikei = Probably Sunday

@Slish - plz do tell your stories...lol

Minerva Exertion August 15, 2008 at 5:22 PM

I think this is FICTION!

I'm not surprized about the chickens in the matress. I've heard of situations like that before.

I say it's fiction because it ain't no way in hell a man would move a crazy b*tch in his home and HE KNOWS she's a crazy b*tch. All that stuff at the beginning of the relationship, he thought that was her representative? Tisk. Moreover, he put up with that bullshuckey for THREE YEARS! No man in their right mind would do that. Move her in to make her feel better??? Ha! This has to be a tall tale.

Good story though!

Jamila August 15, 2008 at 5:37 PM

I'm gonna go with fiction but the sad truth is we all know at least one person that is totally capable of doing some ish like this.

boo! coco August 15, 2008 at 5:43 PM

this is fact i don't care what you say, if it didn't happen to him it happened to someone, trust me i've met all kinds of crazy and this doesn't even seem out of reach for some people

IntrospectiveGoddess August 15, 2008 at 6:36 PM

I'm gonna say FACT...every guy by the age of 25 got a crazy bitch story ...some of the best stories are the true ones.....

ANGELINA August 15, 2008 at 6:41 PM

I think it's a fact. There are some crazy chicks out there...

Ashelle August 15, 2008 at 7:48 PM

Well life is stranger than fiction. I read about a story like this though....middle age husband leaves wife for a woman that could be his daughter, pulled some straight up diary of a mad black woman shit and kicked her out. She went calmly,days later he smells a putrid scent, called the exterminator, removed the carpets, tried everything but couldnt get rid of the scent. Eventually, he had to sell the house, but the house was unsellable, or so he thought. Ex-wifey buys it from him for next to nothing.The day she moves in, she unscrews the curtain rods,and removes the rotten prawns she placed inside just months before.

A Go Bytch August 15, 2008 at 8:00 PM

**** * **** ****** * *** * *
**** * * * * * * * * *
* * * * * * * * **
* * **** * * *** * *

Okay..I was wasting time until time to get off.

it's fiction..girl that was way too funny on a mastermind could have thought of that!

Go B.

A Go Bytch August 15, 2008 at 8:01 PM

you know those stars said fiction until i pressed enter. *sighs*

Keisha "Kitten" Isaacs August 15, 2008 at 10:28 PM

I have to say FACT...sounds believable to me...

G-Sweet August 16, 2008 at 5:45 AM

nah this story is FICTION... cuz if she was that crazy... i doubt that was the last time he seen her... i meant cmon'...lol!

Eb the Celeb August 16, 2008 at 10:22 AM

@ a go b - lol... I thought you were trying to be all creative and ish...lol

KoffeeDyme August 16, 2008 at 12:19 PM

Fiction... I know there are some downright crazy females out there... but this story was too funny...

Liz August 16, 2008 at 12:22 PM

FACT!! i say this because my cousin went on a trip and told his live in girlfriend to be gone when he got back. she was gone... along with EVERYTHING in the house. the chick took all the toilet paper, everything out of every cabinet, took the meat out the freezer and left it on the counter but took the fridge... that is only a step from leaving it in the mattress. and she was psychotic!

YoungBlackBeauty August 16, 2008 at 12:46 PM

I'm gonna have to say fiction. The chick was prolly crazy but aint no way in hell they gone be together for 3 years and him not realize she is that crazy.

MysTery August 16, 2008 at 2:15 PM

WHOA!!! LOL, hope it's fiction.

♥ Arayah. August 16, 2008 at 7:14 PM

wooow.
Im going to say...fact

Chris August 16, 2008 at 9:02 PM

Fact for sure. Sometimes, guys are blind to the insanity until it reaches insane levels, so dude might've been blinded...but he definitely smelled (la-la-la-la-la-ow!) what she was cookin'.

Pajnstl August 16, 2008 at 9:39 PM

FACT!!!
There is NO WAY you made this up! lol

Emeritus August 17, 2008 at 1:49 AM

girl stop! you've gots to be lying.


im going to go with fact cuz really, can you make this ish up?

Dana August 19, 2008 at 9:03 PM

LMAO!! I'm just now catching up for real on all my blogs girl...so please forgive the lateness!! Now that I know this is fact...that's some real scary and hilarious shit!! Haha

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Germaine Richard September 18, 2008 at 12:42 PM

Who's been telling you my business? LOL! I know that shit cannot be made up. It's definitely a fact. I got a sister that's a sick psycho bitch like that

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