I need a bail out dammit!

Whew... for months now I have been trying to keep my spirits high, but dammit now I'm starting to get pissed.

I have not worked a consulting/freelance gig since right before thanksgiving.

My bank account is looking extra anexoric.

For real... I swear when I went to the atm the other day that fool said... I'm just gonna jump

Went on an interview a couple weeks ago, was told I had the gig and was suppose to start Feb. 16th... they call me last week saying the company has put all hiring on hold until further notice... WTF!

Masters degree and can't find a damn job. I mean really... they said the bachelors degree was going to look like the HS diploma soon, but its looking like a Master Degree is starting to look the same way.

Did my taxes and New York State had the nerve to tell me that I owe them money... WTF!

SallieMae gonna make me knock her arse out, as well as all these other people blowing up my phone wanting money. I'm bout to start answering my phone ,"I ain't got it."

So I just signed up with a temp agency... anything to keep the lights on at this point.

Guest Bartending tonight... hit me up offline if you're in NYC and want to drop by.
Especially if you plan on tipping! I got my Victoria's Secret Very Sexy Extreme Push up bra all ready to go... and will be bending over the bar extensively because I ain't looking to come home with a whole bunch of $1.oo bills. Will definitely be making drinks stiff enough that you forget to get your change...lol.

I need a bailout... and if I don't get one... don't look at me funny if you see me half naked, shaking my money maker in Sue's Rendezvous.
Just pull out your wallet and be happy you almost saw all of Eb's goodies!


Anyone need a babysitter? Disclaimer... I beat bad ass kids though!

Eb OUT!


__________________

update at 3pm

Why the spot I was suppose to guest bartend at tonight just called me and said they will be closed tonight because of a plumbing problem. Lawd I swear if it aint one thing, its another.

Will let everyone know when its been rescheduled.

41 comments

Kayos February 11, 2009 at 11:54 AM

Girl, I hate you going through it.

Just pray for your health and maintain your greatness! I know this will pass as well as the other stuff.

If you have to do the Sue's thang...just be the best one in the joint!

Bella February 11, 2009 at 11:54 AM

hahahaha! i WISH i had the guts to be a skripper... cuz i would dammit. just cant do it tho!

that SUUUUCKS about the job putting you on hold... wtf for real. but good luck with everything, and in the meantime treat urself to some dranks!

The Jaded NYer February 11, 2009 at 12:02 PM

hon we're all feeling it... and I have a job!

Let's just say this recession is so bad I've had to get creative with food n shit to make it last. And that's hard in my house 'cause I'm a greedy hog and my skinny-minnie daughters eat like football players!

I don't know how my mom survived the 80s... let me call her and try to get some tips so I don't end up in the poorER house!

Hang in there... even if you gotta work the pole we'll be there to cheer you on! lol

IntrospectiveGoddess February 11, 2009 at 12:02 PM

Damn man, that sucks, now you feel me? Not having a job fucking sucks, get your hustle on the best way you can, times is hard for everybody, I wish you luck in your job search, if I could I would give out a loan but you can't borrow from a perpetually broke person right?

Lady C. February 11, 2009 at 12:15 PM

I feel you Eb!! So many companies have put on freeze on hiring, its ridiculous.

Everyone needs a side hustle nowadays.

And bill collectors need to stop calling, if banks don't have any money, do you really think I have some?!!

Few Redeeming Qualities.... February 11, 2009 at 12:33 PM

I hate Sallie Mae with a vengence. i wish somebody had told me before i signed that sheet of paper. if you dont pay 99% of your minimum on time, your account goes into collections. and my dad co-signed, so they bug him too. if i was a terrorist, they would catch it from me.

Super Dave Van Buren February 11, 2009 at 12:34 PM

My boy about to lose his job and he has 2 mortages to worry about. It's tight all around but I'll find a couple dollars to make it drizzle if you end up at the gentleman's club.. lol

MzInspiredMind81 February 11, 2009 at 12:34 PM

You ain't never lied! Times is definitely HARD right about now. I've always said I'll moonlight at the 'Pretty Kitty' (fictitious strip club in my head) if something don't start shaking up soon.

Thoughts of a Southern gal February 11, 2009 at 12:45 PM

This recession is hurting everyone including the people with jobs. I had to pick up a couple of side hustles. I tutor with A to Z tutoring. They are a nationwide company. They pay anywhere from $20-35/hr. But it may be too late to sign up.

Another thing I do is mystery shop. This is a legit company. I've been doing this for about a yr. The company is second to none. www.second-to-none.com You get paid by the month plus you get free gifts sometimes.

contagiouslyCRANKY February 11, 2009 at 1:08 PM

lmao at the disclaimer of beating bad ass kids....My heart goes out to you hun!!! Hope it gets better soon. SMH at the government trying to kick a sistah when shes down.

ToshaRenelle February 11, 2009 at 1:16 PM

2 words for you! PLUM FOOL!

I feel you, though. Just hang in there. I wanna change my number cause the collectors are stalking me. One thing is a comfort, the President is fighting for US, the people of America, with degrees and talent and promise. He wants to see us make it. Hang in there!

A.J. Brown February 11, 2009 at 1:41 PM

Hey girlie!!!!!!

It will get better, this economy can't stay down forever. I'm just hoping it's sooner rather than later.

But if push comes to shove I will let my alter ego put on a show for some extra cash..lol

lyfesimplified February 11, 2009 at 1:48 PM

Hey hun.... long time no read. I hadn't been by in a minute trying to get use to my new spot and all.

I feel ya hun on the bail out and believe me IF I had the body to be a stripper I would. I guess the man above new better!

You are so silly but I know you are so serious..the money crunch is hitting everyone hun keep your head up!

Go B.

Chanel February 11, 2009 at 1:52 PM

lmfao. I needed that laugh this morning. I 100% feel u on this one. Im about to get cut down to part time on my job...unfortunately my bills won't get the memo and allow me to pay them every OTHER month. PLUS i'm a student and the college system is broke as hell and stingy with the financial aid , so wtf am i suppose 2 do? *shrugs* Oh well. Like u said, the Master's is about to start lookin like a joke anyway, so if I have to drop out and start sellin oranges and strawberries (and whatever else) on the corner, so be it.

Afrobabe February 11, 2009 at 1:53 PM

I feel you babes...Its bad every where...especially now...

laughing February 11, 2009 at 2:10 PM

the money that has been withdrawn out of my account has been going to people who just so happen to have very nice itmes......designer hand bags, leather jackets, very nice cell phones. Don't know how to use it but oh well-I'll be cute trying. You see these people in particular don't take credit cards. Besides I seem to not let the amount of money that I do/don't have determine my happiness. I also think that someone has been trying to steal from my "Short" stash, and this same person has been reading my emails..........what's up with that??????????? I sure would love to have my speakers back.

Tuotierugif >^..^<© February 11, 2009 at 2:26 PM

Man I guess this recession thing is real, I was trying as hard as I could to put it out of my mind...but it doesn't seem to be working lol I hope you manage to get a job though ::crosses fingers::

Ms. Liryc February 11, 2009 at 2:34 PM

LOL, I know what you mean. Things are really tough in this economy now a days... you almost have to sell yourself to buy some bread and milk..

Girl Sue's is the truth, I got jealous the last time I went there with some homies... Girls making one butt cheek bounce, white girls with bigger booties than any black girl from the hood.. Just absolutely jealous!!

so if you do go to Sue's girl.. dudes are gonna make it rain.. its just a thought!!

Honey Devereaux February 11, 2009 at 3:04 PM

Eb, you are so funny! But I know you are serious. It's real in these streets and funds are getting tight. I know exactly what you are talking about. Keep your head and moving forward. Just when you think things are down that is when something will come through.

Beautifully.Conjured.Up February 11, 2009 at 3:15 PM

Girl, if I could make it rain on you, I would. Keep your faith, and something will come through.

BB February 11, 2009 at 3:23 PM

I so feel you about this bailout stuff. There are chicks working at the bank with me with Master's degrees that I supervise. It's crazy. Hopefully since I'm going inot healthcare, and since ninjas don't wanna eat right and stop having strokes and needed speech therapy I'll have a job when I finish. I hope. Keep your head up!

YoungBlackBeauty February 11, 2009 at 3:33 PM

Dayum my bad Eb. I hope something works out for you, Im tryna keep my options open too! Magic City here I come! LOL! J/K!

Amber-Alert February 11, 2009 at 3:56 PM

good luck with the job hunt...things are tight everything is so damn expensive and we all goin thru right about now!!! something will come up soon keep the faith!

*B* Fab February 11, 2009 at 4:13 PM

I am literally in the same boat! This too shall pass! :-)

Kryssy February 11, 2009 at 6:57 PM

oh wow sweetie...
I swear, it's the times... erry'body's strugglin. =(
Keep your head up... you have a lot going for you, so I'm confident that you'll find a fantastic position soon. =)
And by position, I don't mean wrapped around a scripper pole. LOL

Keith February 11, 2009 at 7:22 PM

Hang in there Eb...We are all feeling it..Even those of us who have jobs...I just ran into a guy I knew today who had it goin on a year ago and who is now looking for a job himself..It's rough for everybody...Get your hustle on the best way you can until you get what you want.

glennishamorgan February 11, 2009 at 8:01 PM

I feel you. We all need a bailout. They need to bailout the damn people instead of these companies whose CEOs are rich as cream. Anywho, I'm so sick of Sallie Mae's ass too. Can I at least get my damn degree before they start calling my ass.

Bam February 11, 2009 at 8:59 PM

Sigh.

It is so tight out here.

I told my friends I always take my masters off when looking for a job. Always. Largely because people automatically think you are over qualified. Once I get in, I use it to help move up.

Sad but true...

Amber

MP February 11, 2009 at 9:51 PM

when you figure out how to get a bail out let me know.

sorry to hear about your bartending... that's good money. I went home with $240 my first night.

Urban Thought February 12, 2009 at 1:28 AM

When it rains it pours... Sorry to hear that you're going through a tough time. I know there is little comfort in me saying that "you aren't alone."

Keep your head up though... You'll pull through. You have to.

Ms. Bar B: February 12, 2009 at 3:03 AM

Well damn! Hang in there Eb. See, this is what I'm afraid of, especially out here in Cali where we are about to damn near be a broke state. This stuff is crazy. I am not trying to be a college grad asking mofos if they want fries with that shake, lol. Hell, I just might have to join you in shakin' a little somethin' somethin'.

Oyin February 12, 2009 at 3:17 AM

ummm, I wont look at you funny....shit Im gonna move your ass out the way and try to get somma that too...hahaha.


My account aint looking much better than yours....

Mahoganydymond February 12, 2009 at 8:19 AM

I am with you there.. I have been struggling over the past 2 years.. I am at my wits end trying to figure out what to do next.. If I had 10,000 @ one time, then my life would be cool...

Rich Fitzgerald February 12, 2009 at 10:28 AM

Eb, since you have your Masters, check out University of Phoenix and Kaplan or some of the other online Universities, they are always looking for professors to teach classes. I hear they pay pretty good and you don't have to leave the crib to get your loot.

A.M. February 12, 2009 at 10:44 AM

awww man. Sorry things aren't going so well. The sad part is, they aren't going well for n e of us.

Just here tryna save up enough to get back into school in the fall. Which means I get my pay check, and have to seriously put it ALL AWAY!!! SUCKS

You're a smart girl. Things will look up though :)

ill;kinda February 12, 2009 at 1:14 PM

I'm sorry that times are so hard for you right now. In the end you will have a greater reward, and since you do have your masters it will pay big. You just have to keep faith that something good will fall into your hands.

clnmike February 12, 2009 at 4:40 PM

Well if you ever decide to shake it I suggest you move down south.

Eb the Celeb February 13, 2009 at 3:37 PM

@bella - I dont have the guts... thats why I can joke about it

@lady C - I dont understand how bill collectors still have their job. If no one is paying their bills, then how do they still have jobs to call and harass me

@Few Redeeming - LMAO... my dad co-signed too and yes they call and harass him too

@Lyric - LMAo... glad I'm not the only chick that frequents there with my boys

@Bam - Thx for the tip... I have dumbed down my resume several times, but maybe its going to take that in order for a company to bite.

Thx for the tip RIch

Miss Toya February 14, 2009 at 6:53 PM

You ain't never lied. I def. need a bail out. A Miss Toya stimulus plan ASAP! LOL

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