Thought to ponder : Quoting my damn self... and Erica Jong

"It takes more energy to fight the chemistry than to just let love"

~Eb the Celeb

Is it though... is love really worth fighting for? I know its not suppose to be easy... but in retrospect does is have to be so damn hard? What if you have put all this work into something that was just a mirage of love. Wouldn't that lead you to be cynical about love if the real thing does ever show its face. So does the energy then switch to you not even fighting for love but fathoming that what you have is even love since you thought you knew what it looked like before and didn't. STOP... think about it!

Song of the moment... Common "Punch Drunk Love" feat. Kanye

Album in stores December 9th and its a banger... trust don't sleep on this one.

2nd song of the moment... Beyonce "Scared of Lonely"


ShonaVixen November 28, 2008 at 9:28 AM

I also love 'Scared of Lonely'!!Love is such a complex and yet so simple thing...and where do you draw the line with fighting for love and just plain crazy or paranoid?? sigh

Kayos November 28, 2008 at 9:50 AM

You know what...

I've always said that Love is very easy when you are single. When you're married it's complicated because of the other stuff that comes into play.

However, when you're either are or you're not. There's nothing muddling that up. If you are then you do what you can to make it last...if you aren't, then why sit around trying to make the other person who is feel better when you aren't. Do what your heart wants and don't hurt the poor schlup who is and give them false hope. That's worse.

She W0rd Hustlez November 28, 2008 at 10:01 AM

Yo, I'm feeling that Common and Kanye sample.

Just Jasmine November 28, 2008 at 10:26 AM

I really think when you realize that the love you thought you had isn't love you become cynical out of bitterness, pain and anger but you know its worth fightng for because even that little mirage of lovefelt good when all was well. You think well if that isn't love then imagine the possibilities.
Love is absolutelt worth fighting for. Even in my darkest hour through all teh pain I know its something worth fighting for. I just hope i find that one who"ll fight with me.
for now I'm happy loving myself and my son

ShellyShell November 28, 2008 at 11:17 AM

Well, I'm in a bad ass mood. So at this stage I'm going to have to say. I'm in the middle but leaning towards NO, love isn't worth fighting for! I used to think it was until I linked with the Teacher but some things were said yesterday that have me thinking it's just not worth it...:( I may change my mind but for now this is how I feel.

Nina November 28, 2008 at 11:20 AM

They all say that anything worth having you have to fight for and I must admit, I don't get it. I've never gotten it and I think I will never get it. But, I think that love is worth it. As long as the other person is in the trenches fighting for it, too. The worst feeling in the world is putting in 110% and the other person is putting in 45%.

Good topic!

RiPPa November 28, 2008 at 11:28 AM

Oh shit!

That track by Common is dope. Yup, I must contact my neigborhood bootlegger for that one.


Oh yeah...LOVE...

Yesterday was my wedding anniversary.

I had sex last night.

Love is great!

James Tubman November 28, 2008 at 12:44 PM

you will never have love as long as you are as ignorant as you are now

and as long as you continue to get advice about men from sorry ass females who have no success at all with having great relationships with men

thats just not smart

but of course thats why a moron like you would do such a thing lol

Lovely and Lively November 28, 2008 at 1:01 PM

Well i think love is worth fighting for. I think if you really love that person its worth it. but like everybody else said its only worth it if that other person is fighting alongside you. I like the common joint and the beyonce joint they are different...

Anonymous November 28, 2008 at 1:17 PM

I don't even think I would want fighting for love to be easy. That would take away from what I believe it is and all that it could be.

Neesh November 28, 2008 at 2:22 PM

So basically I LOVE YOUR QUOTE! It's speaking to me and my situation, lol. Oh, and I love "Scared of Lonely" and Beyonce's entire album.

swag_ambassador November 28, 2008 at 4:24 PM

Hmmm.. good question

I believe its worth fighting for, with the right intent. If I know that what Im trying to build will ultimately be worth it, Im gonna fight like ali vs. frazier to the 15th round, my heart is nothing that is given away easily, therefore it should already be worth it to me to sacrifice time and efforts to fight tooth and nail.

just a quick thought

Anonymous November 28, 2008 at 4:29 PM

Hey Blog Bestie :-) Sometimes I wonder if it is all worth it, but just like you said why should we have to fight for it? I'd like to think that it will just flow naturally, but sometimes we have chemistry with someone and they seem to be fighting it. It makes you wonder "Why?". But sometimes people are just selfish and don't want to let go of whatever else they're holding onto. That's when we just have to let go.

Eb the Celeb November 28, 2008 at 6:26 PM

@Shonavixen - Its a thin line... very thin... and yes you were

@kayos - yeah the false hope comes from people who want love but only hold onto something waiting on something better to come along

@just jasmine - yeah just like that quote says "its better to have love and lost than never to have loved at all"

@shellyshell - so I'm guessing you and the teacher didn't have the best thanksgiving... we'll talk more later

@Nina - yeah... I think love is one of those things that cant be defined... that isn't suppose to make sense...

@Rippa - you better not bootleg... support good much bruh... congrats on your anniversary

@James "will always be single and miserable; need to get a life" Tubman - It amazes me that someone like you... that plays on someone's blogs... that makes an appoint to go to different computers every day just to comment on my blog... is calling me ignorant... it also amazes me how you can give advice on your blog about black relationships when you dont have one... I'm sure if you were getting some good pussy on the regular... that what I do on my blog wouldn't bother you at all... so choke your chicken, whatever you have to do to release, because this situation has gotten old really quick. You look like boo boo the fool, your comments dont effect my readership, they dont make anyone's opinion of me change... so your ignorance has NO purpose. At least if your going to be a dumb ass make it have a purpose... now whose the moron?

And where is your family? Isn't black friday the day the people are glad they are off from work to spend time with fam? But first thing you do is run to my blog... its obvious you dont have a life, family, or friends... I'll pray for you... because now I pity you... because now I know why you crave any attention even if its negative because you have no one in real life that shows you any.

@Neesh - I'm not feeling the entire album... I only like 8 of the 16 tracks... Scared of Lonely, Hello and Ego are my 3 favs

@Swag - good point... but your heart not being given away easily... is what may makes the chick have to decide whether or not she is going to fight for your love. Maybe she knows that you care because of how you act but that you are so guarded with your heart that she feels like she will never break the wall... so she gives up... How does one know to keep trying to break that wall or to just give up

@B-more BAP - So true!

Keith November 28, 2008 at 6:47 PM

Hey Eb, I hope you had a nice Thanksgiving. See, I told you that
we are so "there" with each other..
The only songs I Like on Beyonce's
Cd are "Hello", "Ego" (that's my shot), "If I was a Boy" and "Single
Ladies." oh, I kinda like "Broken Hearted Girl." too.

Now on this love thing..Nobody knows what it looks like, but you know what it is for you when you feel it..and even if it doesn't work out for you...the ride was always worth it. Yes it's worth fighting for...because when it's good..aint it real good? Just like
when it's bad, it seucks..but you can't know til you get into it.
Love is like playing the lotto, you
gotta play to win.. You can't know
if it is or it isn't, unless you take a risk.. That's life's
all a crap shoot.

(I just got back from the mall, it
was crazy...I picked up Kanye- 808
and Heartbreaks..I know I'm late...lolol)

Super Dave Van Buren November 28, 2008 at 7:19 PM

I've never been in love so I'm no help here... lol

Ms. Bar B: November 29, 2008 at 3:07 AM

Love can be tricky. Its only worth fighting for if the two involved really want to love each other. Its a two-way street.

The F$%K it List November 29, 2008 at 7:17 AM

I hope you had a great Turkey day and Friday after!

I am a firm believer that real Love is worth fighting for, but I think tons of folks get that confused with fighting about. If you have to fight with someone about the simplest things than its ego you are fighting, not love.

I agree with Keith though love is not something that wears a clear sign you just know its love for you. And when you have truly found that LOVE you can't live without you learn to forget the things that may have once made you jaded about it.

clnmike November 29, 2008 at 8:21 AM

Lol, you are a true romantic.

Eb the Celeb November 29, 2008 at 11:27 AM

@Keith - lol at you liking the single ladies song...I like Broken hearted Girl too... your not late at all on the Kanye... it just came out this week... I'm not feeling it at all

@Dave - You weren't in love with the baby moms?

@F it - It would all be so simple... I wish there was a sign on it... cuz I'm tired of trying to figure it out

@Mike - Sssssshhhhhhh... that's a secret... no one is suppose to know that... and how the hell did you read that from this

Beautifully.Conjured.Up November 29, 2008 at 5:18 PM

First, I must say I'm loving both of the quotes...simply beautiful.

Now, to the main question: Yes, I do believe love is worth fighting for and worth trying hard to attain...under the conditions that the love is mutual, real, and pure. Coming from a spiritual point of view, love is the basic, common emotion placed here via God. I believe He wants us to share and relish in this feeling that He feels for everything He created...especially for mankind; He wants us to love ourselves, love others around us, and love the person that He created just for us.

Ahhh, love...I hope it find me!!!

R. Fitzgerald November 29, 2008 at 6:10 PM

Come on Eb, be fearless. If it doesn't work out, you learn from it and try again the next time.

12kyle November 29, 2008 at 7:46 PM

is love worth fighting for? hell yeah. you had better make sure that it is really love before you start fighting. sometimes we get it confused. anything worth having is worth fighting for. you feel me?

Anonymous November 29, 2008 at 7:51 PM

I need a drink. Then I will come back and consider this query.....

OK I am back. That Erica Jong quote is the shit. That is so true. By doing nothing, you risk it all. I have a friend who needs this quote

Eb the Celeb November 29, 2008 at 8:16 PM

@beautifully conjured - beautifully said

@Rick - lol... easier said than done my friend... I have always been guarded with my heart... I trust know one in love...not even myself... I was there before and love makes you do some retarded ish...especially when your fighting for it... so I'm not even sure I want to be in love

@12kyle - that was my whole point... how can one really recognize it.. so many think they know what it looks like but I dont think any of us really do

@Epsi - What you over there sipping on? And that's my fav part of the quote... doing nothing... means you dont define your own destiny... then you live life wondering what if... so I believe in taking chances, but battle if it should be at my heart's expense... I actually love a challenge... because I feel accomplished when its conquered but I have a problem then with staying interested because maybe that's all that was there and now the thrill is gone.

A.M. November 30, 2008 at 2:48 AM

YAY!!! My B! One of my faves on the album.

Seriously, the ERica Jong quote, I usta live it. Give my all. But it just hurts too much to put that much effort into something that just completely let you down before. I was excited about viewing love that way, and now I don't anymore at all.

I want that feeling again.

Man With Balls November 30, 2008 at 6:02 PM

RUN don't fight!! Look what love did to James Tubman. That nigga is crazy as hell.

You must look like his ex, cause dude is really wildin' out over you. Either that or you gave him some and he lost his freaking mind.

Eb the Celeb November 30, 2008 at 6:58 PM

@A.M. - I feel you... its extremely hard to remain optimistic about love when we are fed all these statistics on the regular about the divorce rate, and the amount of black men outnumbering us by so much

@man with balls - LMAO... Eb runs from but you are FUN-NY... and it def aint that he got some... I wouldn't let him touch me with a 10 foot pole

FREEDOM November 30, 2008 at 7:13 PM

EB...Love is a RISK! We just have to remember each NEW relationship is just that NEW!!!

*B* Fab November 30, 2008 at 8:48 PM

blah! Love is beautiful! It's worth "fighting" for. but i still think love is for suckers ;-) j/p

Single Black December 1, 2008 at 12:12 AM

F*ck Love

It's fake half the time and it takes you off your game!

Anonymous December 2, 2008 at 11:34 AM

I don't like the words "love and "fighting" in the same sentence. I prefer, compromising.

T.C. December 2, 2008 at 11:48 AM

i would definitely say its worth fighting for WITH someone who wants to truly BE WITH its not worth fighting for the dumb stuff...and honestly its HARD but it isn't supposed to be all that HARD...if at the end of the day you HAVE to make yourself believe that you are happy you really aren't...true we are our own worse enemy and sometimes we need to get out of our own way...but fighting for scarps ain't where its at...

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