I want you...when the jump off is itching for more

I want you...when the jump off is itching for more

Labels: Datin' Sexin' Lovin'...oh my / Music / Poetry / RBW Relationship Talk / Video

I pride myself on being able to handle the situation. Never once been the chick that had an "arrangement" and caught feelings. The problems with most jump off situations is that women tend to start casually sleeping with a man that they already like. The biggest no no when it comes to playing this game. Perfect jump off candidates are ones that you feel are attractive but have everything under the sun wrong with them in every other aspect.

You need some examples...well here they go:

1. The fine man fresh out of jail. You know he's backed up depending on how long he's been in jail. He's going to give you some good loving like you've never had before. But being one with a record, he isn't the type of man my educated sistas are going to be trying to bring home to momma.

2. The man with Tiger Woods syndrome. I'm not encouraging messing with married men at all but if he's married I would hope my sisters wouldn't be living under the notion that one day he will leave his wife for you. Chances are it's not happening so that helps you keep a level head to get what you can get from him without catching feelings.

3. The Cole syndrome. Think Cole from one of my favorite shows Martin. The one that's not too bright, the one you never want to be seen in public with, but the man knows how to hit that spot like no other. Sometimes this is the type of brother you don't even want to know where you live. When you need your fix you go to his house, praying that he doesn't still live with his momma. You always have on that coat of yours you keep in the back of the closet that no one would recognize its you in with the hood and dark shades when creeping in and out of his crib.

(Now those are just a couple but I'm sure my sistas have load of other instances. Hit me in the comments with them if you life.)

So as you can see the above are all men that your emotions should block off at the gate and solely in your life for sexual healing. But what happens when you do catch feelings??? How do you approach the man to let him know that him coming over at 2am once a week is no longer working for you???

Men hate the awful words that are "we need to talk" so by any means necessary when it's time for the talk, do NOT start the conversation with that. Just be straight forward with him, but before talking to him you need to be clear with yourself that you two are going to agree to start dating or that you are going to leave him completely alone. There is no possible way after this convo if he's liking the way things are casually, that in your mind and heart the feelings are going to go away so you might as well not even play with fire and continue sleeping with him because its only going to get worse.

Women tend to start leaning into a certain place of entitlement since the man now knows how they feel even if he doesn't feel the same way. So even if he hasn't claimed you, in your head you are plotting how to make him yours while you're still boning him and that is so not smart. If the loving is too good to give up then maybe you don't want to take that gamble of telling him and him not feeling the same.

Like I said before, the bigger problem is not creating a jump off situation with someone that there's a possibility of you being interested in and that will save you a lot of anguish in the future.

Weigh in in the comments on whether you agree or disagree.

Track of the moment is Marvin Gaye "I want you"



Also I wrote a poem of that same title almost a year ago that I posted on RBW. Since, I've made a couple changes to it so I'm posting it again. Enjoy!

I want you

I want you
Yet you only want where my juices flow
Where my muscle contracts
Tightens so hard he's grasping for breath
I breathe in, not wanting to breathe out
Wanting to hold every bit of you in me as long as I can
Because I want you
More than the manpart you're offering
More than the temporary void you fill
All of you I want...
Your mind
So when you're having a bad day thoughts of me make you smile
Your heart
Then maybe I could begin to believe in love again
How did I get to the point where offering my body was good enough?
I buried my emotions as to not get hurt
But now I want love and I want it with you
No longer afraid of the way I feel
But afraid of your reaction to me wanting more
Been waiting for you to offer me the rest of you
Hints haven't worked so I'll give it to you straight
Without a deep, philosophical, or "I think we need to talk" approach
I come to you simply with...
I want you
Now will you have me?

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