Trojan Man...but not all are magnums

For those that don't frequent my music blog ( I'm a stan for Keri Hilson. Not really a stan but I am loving almost everything she is doing right now. She has this new track called Trojan Man.

So let's compare. Its more than evident that if a man has magnums and can't fill them in, you might need to try another. Also let me clarify the filling them thing. If you are hard... and they fit perfectly, and then you buss, and it slips off or you pull out and the condom is still up in me, then you DO NOT fit magnums. Wanted to state that just in case there were any discrepancies floating around out there.

A true magnum is always a good thing, but if you are a trojan man that doesn't quite have the magnum dimensions... that isn't necessarily a bad thing. Trojan obviously has some women high up in the corporate offices because a lot of their condoms cater to women. They have the "Her Pleasure" joint as well as the "Shared Pleasure" with Warm Sensations.

I didn't even bring up lifestyles because for some reason no matter how big or small, black men complain that lifestyles are too tight. I don't have a dick so I can't vouch either way. So men, please weigh in in the comments on that one.

Quick message to the fellas... condoms are NOT one size fit all like they try to say. Really know your body and spend money on condoms that are the right fit for you and will also be a great time for your partner. As a woman who keeps her own condom stash, ladies you too should keep several different brands in your home. Even though we pray we'll end up with a magnum man, we all know that is rarely the case and you don't want a less fortunate one to feel uncomfortable or that he doesn't measure up to your expectations.

PS - I've went 5 months now officially. I didn't start counting until December 1st... but in essence the last time I got some was right before Thanksgiving...and since we're past the middle of April its been 5 months. 5 is my fav number so I think that's enough. I am officially over my Sex Sabbatical and I want some d*ck right now! Big... but not so big I can't enjoy it, chocolate, know how to work it, and make sure I get mine first d*ck all up and through my insides expeditiously. I'm secretly wishing that he has Magnum twister power though
so he can make me feel like a virgin all over again and pop the cherry... heeheheheheheehe


The Jaded NYer April 20, 2009 at 9:48 AM

Eb is over her sex sabbatical? Lord help the chocolate men of NYC... LMAO!

Peyso April 20, 2009 at 10:21 AM

trojans are def the way to go. All condoms do expand to fit whatever size, however its the band that differs between brands. lifestyles band on the bottom of the condom is just too tight.

Also, remember that a dude can fill a magnum one night and not another.

Eb the Celeb April 20, 2009 at 10:23 AM

@peyso - plz explain the fill 1 night & not another... b/c I dont get it

Tuotierugif >^..^<© April 20, 2009 at 10:25 AM

Lmao I want a magnum man too! Hope you get yours honey! ;)

Peyso April 20, 2009 at 10:25 AM

a dude can get harder one night then he is another night. So if at best, you're a marginal filler of magnums, on the nights when u get hard but not ur hardest then ur not gonna fill the magnum

Anonymous April 20, 2009 at 10:35 AM

hahahah I love you for this Eb!

Peyso, you right they EXPAND to fit whatever size but they don't decrease to fit.

Eb the Celeb April 20, 2009 at 10:53 AM

Exactly Southern Gal... it dont matter how hard you get... it matters if that sucker stays on when your back soft... if that sucker doesn't, you aint no magnum man

Ms. Liryc April 20, 2009 at 11:33 AM

Chocolate men hide your penis' ms. eb is out on the prowl and beware she has a hunger that won't be satiated with only one round! You sure you can't go another month? I think you can..(j/k... go ahead girl)

I once dated a dude that was way to big for the Magnum XL, when he was soft.. I swore that dude was gonna damage my insides and make me barren. But it was good when he handled his handle.. ahh the days of having orgasmic sex.. I miss those.. 10 months and counting!!

Keith April 20, 2009 at 1:16 PM

I never liked Lifestyles because not only were they too tight, but they would bust open easily..I had one bust when I was trying to put it on..I had to run out and buy another one, just like in the movie. Even though they're cheaper than Trojans.. I go with the Trojans. You get what you pay for.
(Never tried the Magnum bramd.)One of my Frat brothers told me that Magnums are "very roomy and comfortable." Sounds like it. :)

Congrats on ending that sabattical.
Should I put my ear plugs on tonight around midnight? I do have to work tomorrow. :)

Lina April 20, 2009 at 1:57 PM

Any condom they give out for free at the clinic aint worth it to a dude thats good at breaking the back. I keep Durex and Magnums...Durex seems to both expand and decrease as I have had a magnum man put on a durex with no problem. Im not really all that concerned about what size condom you filling up as much as how I feel afterward. Per se.

Mimi April 20, 2009 at 3:12 PM

This seems like the time to end a sabbatical. I went the 6 months and I am proud of myself.

But I'm perfectly ok with not going another 6 months again! lol

Stew April 20, 2009 at 4:29 PM

lifestyle reds might just be the absolute worst condom ever made. no way i gotta take that back. the worst condom i ever used was a condom called Mr. Happy Hat. I'm not sure if they were just a Greensboro thing, but I do know that it was super thick and it had no lube on it. It was just awful.

i am really curious to see how long it is going to take for you to "get some" now that you are off of you sex break.

it shouldnt take long

Anonymous April 20, 2009 at 5:02 PM

Lol Eb your funny! Trojans are the best!!!

Ma'at April 20, 2009 at 5:07 PM

Ah, yours is ending and I'm pretty sure that these past four months are just the beginning for me, maybe... I like the penis too much to just say no. As for the magnums, I've only had the misfortune of encountering two who couldn't feel those shoes... Personally, I don't trust lifestyles, and we've had the saying that they call em that because using them will change your lifestyle (in that they might break and what not)

Kayos April 20, 2009 at 8:36 PM

I like that line: Condoms are not One Size Fits All!!!

Hahahaha! I'm so ROFL right now! Girl I hear ya!

Anonymous April 21, 2009 at 12:35 AM

see I told you...hahahaha

But thats why I keep coming cos you keep ish real girlie...

nothing wrong with the number 5 either!!

Mr. B2B April 21, 2009 at 2:19 AM

COngs first of all Eb. Whachu done (doing) about staying off of men (both literally and physically) is a very bold step in allowing you to understand yourself so much more..

Now that progress is being made, "ride it"
Just like Jay Sean said...
and please please use a trojan, if he's erm one of us...

ill;kinda April 21, 2009 at 2:28 AM

lma to the bank :)
I love this blog. "...the condom is still up in me, then you DO NOT fit magnums."

E. Christian Wallace April 21, 2009 at 4:16 AM

lol...interesting post. I never tried Magnums. The way I'd hear folks talk about 'em made it seem like you needed a 14 inch joint to fill it out.

Also, why am I up...damn coffee

Keith April 21, 2009 at 9:44 AM

"Mr. Happy Hat" ????-Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

Anonymous April 21, 2009 at 2:10 PM

Thank you for the Magnum Man clarification. Cause sometimes I laugh out loud when I shouldn't. 5 months? You big baby.

Ms. Bar B: April 21, 2009 at 4:20 PM

Haha. I heard that... I need to get up on it and replenish my stash.

JSADTheKing April 22, 2009 at 2:41 PM

Very funny Post and Good luck on finding some good sex not just sex.

Mr.Slish April 22, 2009 at 8:00 PM

5 Months !!! "Smh" Just do it already EB...

Anonymous April 23, 2009 at 11:17 PM

That visual took me outta here :) LOL!

Tunde April 28, 2009 at 4:44 PM

lifestyles are the worst. and in my opinion they are more prone to breaking.

not really gonna say what i use because i feel that would be advertising but i do prefer thin to ribbed or her pleasure or any of that other stuff.

aj.the.poet April 29, 2009 at 12:53 AM

I've actually become a fan of Durex, but I can dig trojans too, but no lifestyles. Not only do they break but I guess they just dont feel the same. Like the difference between a good thick quality wash cloth and the scratchy one from the dollar store. Just no comfort. Congrats on 5 months you better than me after a month I start having New Jack City Pookie moments LOL

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